My life has not been completely perfect but I have had to paint an imperfect perfect picture so that people can choose what I am really like for themselves. It is not as though I have been living a pretence, only that man chose to interpret the lies for his truth.
Blind to the mess and opened to the good side is the only thing man seeks from life; the reality is no one cares about the pain, sadness, love, failure, loss, gain, journey to self-love, redemption, salvation and insecurities.
My desire was not always to be a writer but I did not refuse it when it was offered to me as a healing process and therapy because in reality, no one could heal me apart from myself and a special someone. I dream not to win or loose but to make an impact, a difference, to be the change in my little ways, and in doing so, I have learned to be strong through the pain, laugh through the sadness, I have learned to be secured in my insecurities and as for salvation, redemption, it is God’s grace.
Every phase of life’s experience has been a stepping stone for me so here is the story of a writer’s dream, journey, failure, pain…
What was I born for?
For what reason was I created?
Bonfire bonfire! How high does it flare up?
Here I am out in the cold wondering for what reason was I born into my family?
I scold and hide myself in the wind hoping it will carry me someplace green
Where knowledge unfolds and beauty blossoms
But here I am with my back laid on the cold sand of the seashore
With my shallow heavy eyes fixated on the stars
My mind slowly wanders through a thousand before
To moments that are ought to be forgotten and after a while
My eyes change their focus to the sea as I ask myself
Should I drown myself to have a new life?
Should I let myself go to forget the pains?
But as though a presence shields me
I feel my body being lifted up, only to stop mid air
And I hear voices like the ocean sing but it is only my wild imagination
As the one who performs the magic now a saving grace
Is someone the whole world is yet to still phantom.
I should have died a long time ago and my dreams cut short
But a grace that I do not deserve met me even when I was undeserving of it
About to commit a grievous sin only because the world failed to accept me.
Photo Credit: Unsplash.