Christian Relationship and dating, what could that possibly mean? Being a Christian who wants to date and date right or allowing the principles of Christ to rule every aspect of your life even your dating.
My relationship with Abba is a very exciting one: times where I laugh hard, times where I’m not happy because He didn’t give me what I thought I needed and times where I look back and scream at the top of my lungs: THANK YOU PAPA!!!! Because my eyes eventually opened.
I have had the opportunity to meet different guys and there are some that just have something special that attracts you to them and you instantly think He’s The One! I mean… He’s tall, well spoken, clean shaven, his panache is on-point and on top of it all, the guy has Jesus!!!! Common! What else does a lady want in a man???
BUT, sometimes, after all this stellar qualities, we find out that there’s still something not adding up and you begin to wonder if you have issues.
Now to the main deal! Darling, that saying – When you Have Jesus, You Have everything is 1 million percent right. So first, do you genuinely know Jesus? Can you confidently say He’s an integral part of your life? If you can’t, then am sorry to say that you may not be able to really fulfill your desire of having a Christian relationship.
What is even this Christian Relationship we are talking about? I believe it’s you understanding the love of God FIRST in your life and being able to reciprocate that love back to someone who also understands God’s love for him. God is Love and everything that we must do in His name has to have an element of Love in it. If you do not understand how to love yourself first, how do you intend to love another? You can’t give what you don’t have.
Do you tell yourself how beautiful, smart, wonderful, and blessed you are? Do you motivate and believe in yourself? Do you value yourself? Do you encourage yourself? Only someone who understands self validation will be able to validate someone else genuinely.
After establishing you have all these and you think it’s time to share your love with someone else, then I think you are ready to take the next step in life – Being in a relationship.
A relationship is between 2 people who basically may have different idiosyncrasies. So, that means you learning to love and accept people just the way they are. Here are few little highlights in having a successful relationship:
Be Understanding: You need to realize that both of you are from different backgrounds hence you may not agree on everything but that doesn’t also mean you should immense yourself in endless arguments. It’s okay to find a soft landing sometimes during your discussions
Be real: Please, don’t be someone who you are not in your relationship. A relationship is extended friendship (my definition) so you need to be as honest and straightforward as you can be.
Be open-minded: Your ideas don’t have to win all the time. Allow him to express himself and also be open enough to believe his ideas will work.
Set Boundaries: To Thine Own Self Be True: Body they say is not wood. Inasmuch as you both have emotions developed towards each other doesn’t give you the liberty to explore all the emotions. Please don’t try and act like James Bond because you will fall like a pack of cards. It’s usually advisable not to be alone all the time to avoi d temptation; so know your boundaries.
Trust and Communication: Let communication be fluid and easy. Don’t hide things from each other and learn to trust your partner. Trust is earned so you both have to work on that.
Have meaningful conversations: You don’t have to base your discussions on trivial issues all the time. Talk about Life, God, Career, Politics and other things that will build you.
Finally, let your focus be on JESUS! Trust me; you can’t go far without Him. Let Him be a part of that relationship. Pray together, Fellowship Together and ALWAYS include Him in all your plans and He will definitely come through.
Also, my dear single sister trusting God for the perfect relationship, please don’t give yourself unrealistic targets. You can’t pressure God to work with your plan. Your key prayer should be that He will give you a man after His Heart and every other thing hopefully will fall into place. I’m not saying you should be specific in your requests, but don’t forget that Your Package must come with the most important item – Jesus and then other specs can follow. If you allow and trust His timing, He won’t disappoint you. Don’t be moved by what others are saying around you, remember it’s your life here and it’s not worth any silly gamble. Be open, be loving, be Prayerful and God will meet you at the point of your need In His Perfect Timing.
Photo Credit: Kat Smith.